A Festival Of Giving (a damn).
It is the season for anniversaries, is another one for you. Did you know that this week marks the 40th anniversary of the Christmas No.1? Obviously, there have been more Christmas charts than that, but it was only in 1984 that William Hill hit on the wheeze of running a book on what song would be top of the charts for Christmas Day. And that was arguably the first time it became a "thing", a target, a point of notability.
But this year you could have been forgiven for not realising that this week is the week of the Christmas chart, the one that is "current" for Christmas Day itself, because the sensation is almost entirely lacking. And that may well be the reason why the Christmas No.1 is not only the very song that the bookies ended up paying out on in 1984 (the Band Aid single ruined the original book and they span another one up without it), but the very same record that won everyone their bets exactly 12 months ago.
Last Christmas by Wham - a 40-year-old record- is No.1 this week for the second week running, the ninth of its lifetime in total and most pertinently of all the official Christmas No.1 for the second year in a row. Only one other record in history has been Christmas No.1 in two different years - Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen, which scaled the peak in 1975 and 1991. Two other songs have been Christmas No.1 in different recordings. Mary's Boy Child the festive champion for Harry Belafonte in 1957 and Boney M in 1978, while a version of Do They Know It's Christmas was at the top for the season in 1984, 1989 and 2004. But notably not in 2014 or 2024.
All in all though this is weird. Because for the second year in a row the Christmas No.1 is there pretty much by default. It isn't that it is propelled there by mass virality or a specific surge in interest. It just happens to be the most popular Christmas song at a time when Christmas songs dominate streaming. And because nothing else either un-festive or even contemporary has managed to squeak more chart sales, Last Christmas is there by rote rather than privilege. We perhaps should be more grateful than we are to Ladbaby whose gatecrashing sales antics at least prevented this situation from manifesting itself before.
Could Have Contended
It is not that the door wasn't wide open for a different song to top the charts. The total ACR-depressed sale of Last Christmas is 59,426 (down from 61,000 a year ago). That's in line with the average No.1 single over the past year or so but not so many that would bar any other single with enough streams from the usual chart audience, or spontaneous purchases from people with charity in their hearts from topping the pile. This was up for grabs for sure. But of the much-trailed "contenders" that were spoken of in the weeks leading up to this, with one notable exception not a single one is anywhere near the Top 40 never mind the Top 10. Groups of singing firemen? Nowhere. Lib Dem leader Ed Davey and his charity shenanigans? Nowhere (he sold a marvellous 451 copies). The exception mentioned above is the season's token slice of political invective. Freezing This Christmas, credited to Sir Starmer & The Granny Harmers is a parody rewrite of the 1974 Christmas No.1 Lonely This Christmas by Mud, protesting the government's policy on winter fuel payments for the elderly. They possibly ramped up the PR for this a bit too late, the track only gaining media traction at the end of the week thanks to a concocted story about the BBC declining to play it. Had these news stories landed seven days earlier then there might have been a different conversation to be had. Languishing in the lower reaches midweek it finally makes No.37. But even The Kunts with more straightforward political invectives made the Top 10 with ease.
This has all been pretty awkward for Official Charts, for whom the hype around the Christmas No.1 race is normally an easy PR win, a chance to remind people that the singles charts are still a relevant thing, still exist and still matter to many. But there just weren't any stories to tell, much as they tried. The Wham track had an early lead from the first proper midweeks, extended that as the week went on and eventually triumphed by an easy margin. The only saving grace perhaps is that Last Christmas being the first ever song to be Xmas No.1 two years in a row and on the 40th anniversary of its release to boot is actually a major story in itself. And you never know that may be enough to get some proper media traction.
At the very least this may even sow the seed that the 2025 Christmas No.1 position is very much up for grabs by someone who wants to make a play. Who knows, maybe even a contemporary pop song.
The Rest Of Ye Merry Gentlemen
The homogenisation of default Christmas songs playlists (of which more next week) means that the biggest festive hits of the Christmas chart are the ones you would expect. All I Want For Christmas Is You makes No.3 for the festive period (in the process setting a new record for 100 weeks as a Top 40 single), while Brenda Lee's Rockin' Around The Christmas Tree is at No.5.
Sandwiched between them is the token newbie - Tom Grennan's It Can't Be Christmas rises to No.4 to become his first ever Top 5 hit. All thanks to Amazon plays, naturally. It will be more interesting to see where it ends up this time next week, of which more anon.
Someone Wake Up Grandad
Last week I kind of underegged the pudding with a quick analysis of the oldest living performers on the chart this week. Because the re-arrival of perennial classics means that Christmas is generally the time when the elderly get to shine on the charts - even if it is with songs they recorded decades ago. So the true list of oldest chart performers this week looks a little like this:
John Williams - 92
Yoko Ono - 91
Darlene Love - 83
Paul McCartney - 82
Brenda Lee - 80
Jose Feliciano - 79
Noddy Holder (Slade) - 78
Cher - 78
Elton John - 77
Roy Wood (Wizzard) - 77
Jona Lewie - 77
Shakin' Stevens - 76
Bruce Springsteen - 75
Chris Rea - 73
Liz Mitchell (Boney M) - 72
The Yule Log has hit 53 - only three more than last week you will note, and down from last year's 59. The record for the Christmas chart was set in 2021 when 63 festive-themed songs clogged up the Top 100.
So it is pleasing to note though that contemporary unseasonal songs are more than holding their own. And this is a point worth making. Although the size of the singles market generally reaches new peaks over Christmas as more people than ever before stream songs on smart speakers, the numbers for the regular chart hits don’t actually drop all that much. Current songs are played just as much as they usually are. All they truly lack is visibility.
Pretend It Isn't Happening
Former No.1 That's So True by Gracie Abrams is leading the way still, clinging firmly to No.2. APT meanwhile is the song that refuses to die, holding its own at No.5 on its ninth week on the chart. But the biggest plaudits once more go to Lola Young. Messy, her ode to a useless boyfriend who cannot decide what version of her he wants, still has a rocket strapped to its back and rises to No.7, cutting a swathe through streams of festive favourites. It is nailed on to be one of the biggest hits of the new year for sure.
There's even room for a brand-new entry. Nobody releases new songs at Christmas time, right? That would be stupid. Tell that to KSI who dropped his quite spectacularly new track Dirty and enjoys a new entry at No.31 - a chart position that is only depressed by the sheer volume of other short-stay singles above. Its big selling point is a guest vocal from no less a superstar than Billie Eilish, proving that the former gamer now swims in the big pond for sure. Once they vanish in a fortnight then Dirty will also be well in contention. It is KSI vs Lola for the first No.1 of the new year for sure.
Sweeet
The battle to be top of the albums chart for Christmas was a more intriguing one. As ever, this is also less of a distinction than it ever was before, given that nobody actually gifts albums for the holiday and the chart is still more about streams of existing products than large sales of newer ones. But the winner is - surprisingly - Sabrina Carpenter, as Short N' Sweet returns to No.1. Never out of the Top 3 since release, it hits the top for the first time since its first week on sale back in September.
Now can we mention the elephant in the room? For all the traditional hype about the "Christmas chart" and the importance of being "Christmas No.1", we chart watchers know the full truth. The most important chart listing of the holiday period is actually the one produced next week. The final chart of 2024. And this year surveying sales and streams from 20th through to 26th December. Or in other words almost exactly the final week of streams of Christmas records before they all go back into the loft until next November. What tops the chart next time will truly be the biggest song of Christmas. And it is the week when the yule log peaks. See you then for that countdown.
